by David Bonnie | Oct 12, 2014 | Ladyboy Articles |
I am sure that you have read that ‘Ladyboys can be found in many places all over Thailand. They have lots of different jobs and are highly visible’. While that may be true and to some degree Annie’s advice about keeping one’s eyes and ears open is valid, its also very general advice and when one is in Thailand on holiday, time is a factor. You may want a Ladyboy girlfriend but it’s easy to be distracted by the prostitutes who are ‘in your face’ at every turn in Pattaya and parts of Sukhumvit Road in Bangkok. You may want to stray from that ‘well-trod’ path and venture into ‘real’ Thailand but you only have a few weeks. You want to experience sex with more than one ladyboy and the easiest way to do that is by hanging out in ‘Hookerville’. I would do exactly the same were I in your shoes and of course, in the past, I did! Many of us come to Thailand in search of something. We may not be certain what it is but I would hazard a guess that is something that we may all refer to as ‘freedom’. After possibly spending years as a wage earner, husband and father, putting the needs of others before your own, you may feel like you deserve some ‘me’ time. Who could blame you? Not me! I have been on the same journey and experienced the highs and lows that you too will experience. But this new found freedom you have found as a tourist or ex-pat carries some risks to both your financial and...
by David Bonnie | Sep 27, 2014 | Ladyboy Articles |
Yak doo naanan (Looking for a long time, specifically said about a prospective partner) What is culture? 1. Artefacts and Art of a race or society 2. Norms and values of a society 3. Basic Assumptions about behaviour I want to focus on the latter and first try to explain how difficult it is to completely understand Thai culture when one is a perpetual stranger no matter how long one lives here. The basic assumptions of a culture are implicit and are an inherent part of every day life. They invoke routine responses and actions, being so intrinsic a part of the culture that they are no longer questioned, but inherited and built into the cultural expectations of shared existence. These assumptions are difficult for members of the group to explain. They are handed down generation to generation and are virtually inaccessible to non-members of the culture. That being said, no person of any sensitivity could come to Thailand and remain unaffected by Thai culture. Thai people live with some cultural mores that westerners find strange. The difficulty one will experience beyond the simple acceptance of everything one encounters about the new culture is which aspect of the culture to adopt and which to reject and under what circumstances. Having lived in Thailand for four years now I have passed through various stages of culture shock and acceptance. Interacting with Thai people every day allows one to experience both positive and negative traits and aspects of the country. All of my perceptions about Thailand are ‘salted’ by my fondness for the place and my preference for living in Thailand...
by David Bonnie | Sep 23, 2014 | Ladyboy Articles |
India’s first transgender news anchor has appeared on regional television just months after the country’s Supreme Court recognised transgender people as a legal third gender. Padmini Prakash, 31, worked as a dance instructor and acted in soaps before being recruited to Lotus News in the southern state of Tamil Nadu. She told the Times of India she was disowned by her family when she told them she was transgender and has faced discrimination throughout her life. But she has won widespread praise since her first broadcast in August. “I was very worried because I also had to focus on my diction and maintain a steady narrative pace to ensure that there was clarity and viewers could understand me,” Ms Prakash said. Her popularity with viewers ensured a rapid promotion to become the face of the daily 7pm news bulletin. G.K.S. Selvakumar, chairman of Lotus News, told the Times of India the channel was “very supportive”. “After initial trials, we were convinced that she had the potential to be an excellent news anchor,” he said. Ms Prakash has been involved in transgender rights activism in the past, protesting against the discrimination, harassment and stigma experienced by sexual minorities in India. Campaigners estimate there are hundreds of thousands of transgender people in the country but because they were not legally recognised until earlier this year, they have been ostracised, faced abuse and often been forced into prostitution. In April, the Supreme Court’s landmark ruling recognised ‘transgender’ as a legal third gender and called on the government to ensure equal treatment. Nepal, Pakistan and Bangladesh have also legally recognised the transgender community....
by David Bonnie | Sep 22, 2014 | Home, Ladyboy Articles |
2. Be a Man with a Plan When I came to Thailand I thought I was through with relationships and I was happy about that. Having experienced several long-term relationships and three marriages (and divorces) in the UK I planned to relish the freedom that an escape to Thailand offered. However, after settling in Thailand I realised that I really missed having a girlfriend and after one disastrous, chastening and frankly heart-breaking ‘save-a whore’ experience I made a plan. Yes, I actively planned and used a set of criteria to find a real girlfriend and I can tell you how you can do it too. I am not suggesting that you never do anything spontaneous. That would take the fun out of things completely and getting yourself out of ‘scrapes’ with our ladyboy brethren will be terrific learning tools, providing you survive. Free yourself from western guilt but stick to your western principles. Dating in Thailand differs from dating in the west in a number of ways. Dating ladyboys differs from dating genetic women in a number of ways too. You will have heard the stories about prostitution and how western men come to Thailand because they can’t get a girlfriend or get laid in their own countries. Most of those stories and comments you may hear or read come from western women who have such an enormous sense of entitlement that even the richest, sexiest, kindest man alive would still disappoint them simply by being a man. Marriage in the west is also such a minefield that many, men, even young men, have ‘swallowed the red pill’ and...
by David Bonnie | Sep 22, 2014 | Home, Ladyboy Articles |
1. Introduction Annie, who is my perfect girlfriend, told me that the best way for a foreign man to find a ladyboy girlfriend is for him to walk out into the street and open his eyes, ears and mouth! While it may not seem as easy as that in Thailand’s teeming and eclectic metropolis; Bangkok, there is a simple wisdom in her advice. A favourite bon mot of Thai people is ‘Don’t think too much!’ There are lots of websites about Thailand and Thai women or Ladyboys. Those I have read seem to be written by intellectual midgets, children (men under 30) or misogynist sex tourists with an axe to grind about ladyboys. You will be treated to stories of how the blog writer does not pay for sex and is always surrounded by beautiful university girls and sneers at sex tourists or how no Thai girl should ever be trusted and will ruin your life if you let them. Many of these so-called writers clearly have little experience of Thailand and its denizens, perhaps only writing from the perspective of a tourist. Even the best of these writings offer a polarised view of Thailand and its dating scene. The characters in the stories are bad men, bad girls and no hope. The truth is full of shade, colour and subtlety. In my experience almost all men living in Thailand have paid for sex at some time or still do even if it’s only from time to time. Some men choose to pay for sex all the time. They actively choose this in preference to having a girlfriend, or...
by David Bonnie | Aug 11, 2014 | Home, Ladyboy Articles |
Thailand has the highest rate of Transsexuals throughout the world. According to some academics, the numbers differ from about 10,000 to (unofficially) 300,000. Even if the number of 10,000 is an accurate one, it would still represent an incidence substantially above that estimated for transgender people in most other parts of the world. To explain the case for this high number of transsexuals, some academics refer to the impact of Buddhism in Thailand and how it leads to an understanding of transsexuals in the current day. The terms ‘transsexual’ or ‘transgender’ are rarely used in Thailand. Instead, “Kathoey” is a common term. It was originally used for hermaphrodites (human being who have both sexes- male and female), but nowadays it is mainly used to describe the transgender male. Looking up the word “kathoey” in a Thai language dictionary, we get the following definition: ‘the characteristics of a kathoey is someone who cross-dresses (lakka-phet), a male who likes to act and dress like a woman and has a mind like a woman”. Ladyboys themselves favour the term, Ladyboy over kathoey, considering it a politer form of address. Interestingly they use the catch-all term to include males who behave in a feminine way that in the West would be described as ‘camp’ this regardless of whether the individual has undergone surgery or not, has long hair or not or wears make-up and female clothes or not. The number of kathoey in Thailand is surprising to the American or European traveller and the reasons for their number may, at least in part, lay in religion and religious attitudes in Thailand. The main...
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